Happy News

The furnace is fixed!

At least that's what they tell me. I've heard it before.

What's even more amazing is that the repair guy only charged us $210 for the whole thing! Listen, that guy was here a good eight hours working on our furnace. He left twice to get parts. For part of the time, a second guy was working on it too. Can you believe we got off that cheap?

The name of the company is Southtown Heating & Cooling. I want to say this, here, because I am recommending this company to anyone in the southern Dayton area who needs HVAC work. They've been coming out to help us since we first moved in here - and got a quote from another company to clean our furnace for about 4 times more than Southtown charged. Nice guys, too!

It's nice to be able to recommend businesses that serve us well, isn't it? Seems like more often than not, we're complaining about bad service or high prices, or maybe just a rude employee having a bad day. I try to point out the good things too, even to national corporations, and sometimes they even send me coupons and gift certificates. Once I got a free two-day canoe rental and camping trip when I wrote a letter to the owner of the livery saying how great they were. Try it!

But don't be like this guy, and do it just to see what you get:
http://www.the39dollarexperiment.com This guy's letters are just downright silly. It's kind of interesting to see what happened in response to the letters, though.


UPDATE on Happy News: Hubby's car is fixed too! They told me it might cost a LOT and we should be prepared for that...but...get this. Hubby called to find out the total. They said $130! We cheered! Then they called later and said they had the FINAL total. It was $113! We cheered louder! Then when I went to pick it up, that wasn't the actual total...the total was...get ready...$84.53. Is that amazing or what? I mean it's a freaking miracle when your repair bill goes DOWN!!!

Between the furnace and the car...I swear, we must have an angel. Mom, did you do this? Thanks!

That Stinkin' Furnace!

Yes, literally, the furnace stinks. Remember I mentioned the CO detector? We put it in the lower level bathroom/laundry room, which is adjacent to the boiler room. As I sat here at my computer last night, I noticed a distinct reek of partially burned diesel fuel (heating oil, diesel, same thing) and then the detector started beeping. Well, now we're conditioned to FREAK when alarms like this go off, right? Whether there is a fire, or an output of deadly carbon monoxide, something has to be done in a hurry! Fortunately the problem was mostly confined to the laundry room, though I think I had begun to feel a little lightheaded.



We shut the furnace off, stuffed the wood stove full, and were thankful it wasn't a particularly cold night.

The repairmen (two, this time - we usually just get one guy) came around noon and have been here ALL DAY. They say it needed cleaning. They say the oil pump, which was replaced two months ago, is bad. Goodness knows what else is wrong with the stupid thing.

Meanwhile, we're sort of getting ready to go out for the evening to a friend's party. I baked banana bread, yum yum! But what if they're not done by seven-ish? Will one of us have to stay home? Will we have another cold night and hope they'll come out tomorrow? On a Sunday?

And most importantly, just how much is this going to cost me? Enough that we could just have bought a new furnace in the first place?

I'd love to get a different heating system. But these hot water baseboard heaters are all over the house. There's got to be a way to do this more efficiently.

It's A Conspiracy

Sometimes it seems like all of my possessions are conspiring against me - the useful items that is, not the ones that just sit on a shelf and look pretty. My nic-nacs are behaving themselves. It's the appliances, the vehicles, the furnace, and even sometimes the furniture that isn't too trustworthy these days. In fact, some days it seems that everything I own is going wonky.

My husband's car is in the shop right now; there's a problem with his 4-wheel drive. And it just came back from the shop three weeks ago, for something else. It's out of warranty, so these repairs are not cheap.

Our furnace is definitely not to be trusted. It's old and grouchy, an ancient oil fired boiler system that seems to always have something that needs replacement or tweaking. Last week something called the "transformer" needed replacement (I thought those were action figure toys) but had to wait and cross our fingers while it limped along. Got the part ordered and installed this morning, but then around 5 p.m. it quit working entirely. Someone came out to fix it again and it seems to be OK, but I'm not reassured. The repairman told us to be real careful to make sure our CO detector was working. Nice.

The computer in the family room needs maintenance or an upgrade, or both. The drawer in our brand new fridge isn't sliding right. Our back porch leaks. Our rear hose spigot doesn't work. Our home's foundation is shifting and the guys that supposedly fixed it the last time have to come back and jack it up some more. Because of this, several doors don't shut properly. And the "power paw" on my brand new vacuum cleaner quit working yesterday, too.

But I'm not going to say "what else could go wrong?" because there are a great many other appliances, small and large...furnishings...gadgets...vehicles...and structures around here that could betray me at any given moment. If you stop and think about it, it's terrifying! Sort of like Mutiny on the Bounty!

Makes you stop and think, too, what would we do without these items that are supposed to make our life easier? (Make our live more expensive is more like it.) Back up plans are good. For example, we have a fireplace with an insert, so if we have firewood (we do!) there's a backup heat source, though we might have to spend all our time in the one room it manages to warm up. If my stove quits working, I have other cooking methods available. I can wash clothes in the bathtub if I have to, and line dry them. If the TV croaks, we could always play board games and read books! (Yeah, like that'll happen.)

The only thing I couldn't live without, the one thing that would seriously mess with my life and my happiness and ultimately my sanity...the one thing I cannot easily replace with a back up plan...is...my computer! ACK!!!! Take away my microwave, take away my blender, take away my hair dryer...but please don't take away my Internet!

I Slept In Late

Sleeping late isn't unusual for me. I like to stay up late -- very late -- and when I can, which is rarely, I like to sleep till noon. I know this is a bad habit. I would get more done if I got up earlier. But I think I am a hedonist at heart, and sleeping late is just so decadent!

This morning the kids let me sleep till ten. My son was at a friend's house, but he called me on his new cell phone, of which he's very proud. I know very well that from a practical point of view a nine year old boy does not need a cell phone. Neither does an eleven year old girl, but both have them and I'm glad of it. They both have active social lives and participate in extracurricular activities. This way, no matter where they are or who they are with, they can call me. And they do.

Case in point: one evening last year my daughter was with a friend's family, out for dinner at a restaurant. My daughter went to the restroom and called me to ask if she ought to be concerned that the friend's father had consumed two beers during dinner; was it still OK for her to get into the car with him driving? I told her that two beers with dinner was just fine, but any more than that might not be. And when I got off the phone, I sank down to my knees - seriously - and I thanked God that my daughter knew to question this and had the confidence and ability to call me and ask. A decision such as this might save her life one day.

In a less dramatic scenario, both kids tend to call me on their cell phones while sleeping over at friends' houses just to say "goodnight." This is incredibly sweet, and certainly not something they would do if they had to use the house phone. To me, that's worth the $25 a month I pay for their two lines.

So, my son called me to ask when I was coming to get him. I showed up at his friend's house around 11:30. His friend's mom just had surgery for breast cancer. The doctors say it went well, but her lymph nodes tested positive, so she'll need chemotherapy. How horrible! We are praying for her. I hope I can say and do the right things to support this wonderful family. This isn't the first problem they've had -- about two months ago, her sister died of lung cancer. Sometimes life gives us more than we ever counted upon having to bear.

Puts my own loss into perspective.

So many people have died within the past few months. I wonder if it's just that I'm more sensitive to those stories, or that I'm just getting older and by virtue of that will hear of more people dying, or perhaps it really is a run of bad luck?

Let's see...we have Dan Fogelberg, Bhutto, Tammy Faye Bakker, my aunt's mother. Mary from my Wed. morning bowling league just lost her sister. An online acquaintance is grieving the death of her 32 year old brother in law. And there are many more.

But life is for the living, right? We had yummy bean and ham soup, with the last of the Christmas ham, for dinner. My daughter has two of her friends spending the night. We're going to visit friends on Saturday to play some games, and we're bringing our kids to play with theirs. You know, as rough as it is to deal with the bad things in my life, the day to day stuff is still pretty damn good, and I am thankful.

Just for fun, I thought it might be neat to show our family's three generations of women. I wonder if there's a lot of family resemblance here? It's hard to see it when you're so close to it.

Christmas Blessings

I'm going to say something that often offends people, or at least causes them to shake their heads at me and go "tsk, tsk..." but secretly I think I have more people agreeing with me than not: I don't like Christmas. If it were up to me, I'd go to sleep the day after Thanksgiving and wake up on January 3rd.

Why? It's a royal pain in the hiney. I have to spend money to buy gifts for people who don't need anything, and that counts my own children. I have to find places and uses for things other people give me, things I didn't need either. Don't get me wrong; I'm a pretty generous person and I like the idea of giving gifts. I like gifts that are really well thought out and appropriate. Unfortunately most people think that means "dull and practical," like the gifts I got this year from my husband, a vacuum cleaner and a George Foreman grill. I wanted them both, but YAWN, how boring! I could just as well have gone and bought them myself. I've been doing that lately. For example, there are these house slippers I've been wanting for years, specifically black Totes Isotoner ballet slippers. At least 5 years I have put them on my list, and I've received just about any other kind of slipper you can think of instead. So this year I went out to Kohls and got them myself. They were on sale for 40% off, too.

So what are good gifts? The best gift is either something that would really improve your life but you can't afford, a luxury you'd love but would never get for yourself, or something handmade from the heart and hands of the giver. Last year I made my mom a quilt. It wasn't perfect, but it was pretty, and I think that's probably the best gift anybody had given her in a very long time.

It's folded up and sitting in my bedroom right now.

Christmas isn't the same, of course, without my mom. We celebrated with a modest dinner that my husband helped me prepare; ham, green beans, roasted potatoes, corn, dinner rolls, and my homemade pecan and french silk pies. My sister-in-law, her boyfriend and her 3 kids came over, as did my father-in-law. I really missed my mom, though. She'd sit in the kitchen chatting with me as I finished up, and later while I cleaned the kitchen. It was kind of lonely in there this time.

She did give me a gift, though. A few of them, in fact. I chose them, but I'm sure she would have been happy to give them. I got a new refrigerator, stove and microwave. I am also getting the chance to finish my college education!

Yes, that is right - I am going back to college to earn my Bachelor's Degree. I'm so excited! I've been wanting to do this for a long time, but never thought I'd be able to pay for it. With the inheritance my mother left for me, I can! I have no doubt in my mind this is what she would want me to do. Thanks, mom. Thanks go to my dad too, because he worked just as hard to save and invest that money. I will make them proud.

If all goes well, I will be attending Wright State University. I sent in my application, but I am still waiting to receive my transcript from years before at UC so that I can finish the process. I am going to get my degree in English, with a certificate in professional writing.

I drove with my daughter today (my son was at a friend's house) to see the college - just to drive around and get a first look at the place. I wasn't even sure where it was. It's big! I feel completely lost and, to tell the truth, scared! I am going to be 40 years old in less than one month, and to be going back to college at this age is pretty intimidating. I have to do it, though, or at least give it a good try!

We stopped in at "The College Store" where they sell WSU T-shirts, school supplies and books. I wanted to buy myself a shirt! I also got my daughter a few school supplies (they always need this stuff!) and a pad of graph paper for quilt designing. I feel "official" now!

No hurry, though. The next few months for me will be busy enough as I try to settle my mom's estate, go through her stuff and get her condo ready to sell. I'm not doing anything till the kids go back to school after Christmas break, but just thinking about the job is overwhelming. What am I going to do with all that stuff? Sell some of it, donate most of it, but there will be a lot I just can't part with. Furniture, for example - a brand new dining room set, brand new sofa, two bedroom sets, etc. All the craft and sewing supplies! All the "keepsakes"!!! We may get a storage unit to hold things temporarily because it will take me a long time to go through it all.

My husband is talking about taking over our garage and finishing it to make me a big office and craft room. Wouldn't that be lovely? My current office is tiny and dark. This would have actual windows and a door to the outside. I'd have a place for all my mom's craft things - brand new cutting table, a dressmaker's model, a New Home sewing machine that embroiders - and oh, so much more. I want to simplify my life and cut down the clutter of my possessions, but this is useful stuff! Ah, well, it doesn't have to happen overnight. Soon, though!

My dear hubby has been very supportive through all this. In some ways I think he's taking it harder than I am. She was kind of his second mom, especially after his passed away a few years ago. He's cutting down his hours at work to eliminate overtime so he can help me, but he says he can't go over to her condo without crying. I'm having trouble too, but I have a lot of happy memories to sustain me.

Funerals Are Horrible

My mother passed away on December 8, at about 1:30 in the morning.

My father died about 8 years ago, and I am an only child, so I am now alone. Well, except for my husband and children. And my two aunts, one uncle, cousin, her husband and her two kids...but it's still a very lonely feeling. I may be nearly 40, but I feel like an orphan.

It's been a rough couple of weeks. I had to plan my mom's funeral. She did most of the arrangements, including the important part of paying for it, but I had to choose the final details, call people and tell them about her death, go to the cemetery and pay them to dig a hole next to my dad. I did the best that I could, but somehow I feel that I fell short of what could have been done.

Mostly, I was unhappy with the memorial service. My mom didn't belong to a church, but we do. I wanted to have our own church pastor conduct the service. But two days before her death, my home phone quit working and the phone company couldn't restore it till five days later. The funeral director tried to call our church, but the message didn't go through. So we had one of those well-meaning but generic services, a "fill in the blank." You know the kind.

"We are gathered here to pay respects to -----. She was born in ----- on -----, she was married to -----, her children were -----, and she liked to ----- and -----."

Well, our church pastor, Rev. Joe Redmond, called me yesterday and offered to come out to our house and give me a book called "Good Grief" to help me through. He also offered to conduct a short memorial service at our house for just our family. I thought that was sweet, though I didn't really see the point. Still, we went through it. The service was kind of odd; I am not accustomed to having church services in my living room. Also my cat Sterling kept meowing loudly and making a pest of himself during the whole thing, making us smile during this serious occasion. I think I would have preferred just having him there to chat with about my mom and her life. I think her life was really interesting, and I'm going to have to write down as much as I can remember before my brain cells muddle it up.

Here is her wedding photo:



I've been told I look like her. It always kind of bugs me -- my mom wasn't really a pretty woman, by general standards of beauty. She was, however, absolutely stunningly beautiful on the inside. If I aspire to "look like" my mom, that is how I want to do it -- in my heart.

OK, I Mean It This Time

Last time I posted, I was going to start blogging again. That was what, early 2007? Now 2008 is mere days away and I didn't do what I said I would do.

I am a reluctant blogger. But I've been told that blogging can be therapeutic. I'm going through kind of a rough time right now. Maybe it will help to write it out.

Blogs need themes, don't they? Topics...something other than "just life in general," or what happened to me today. But that is what I want this to be. This is the only place where I can be totally self-indulgent and focused on ME, ME, ME...and I'm going to enjoy it.

I've been told I'm amusing. Or at least as interesting as a car crash by the side of the road. We'll See.